aperspective

Do you see what i see? I finally designed this thing! AND it only took me about... oh i'd say about 3 hours. Right now it is 3:21 am and i am tired. But i feel complete somehow... because of this! Ah it makes me happy ^___________^

Well, other than doing this, today i have acctually been slightly productive - improvement! I woke up at 8 am by myself, no alarm clock which was very very strange. I think my 4 hours nap yesterday would be the reason for that. Then i had breakfast, realized that i am out of almost everything edible, ate what i could, and sat down with my biology. I can now say that i understand how neurons transmit electrical impulses. This is of course meaningless information in the real world, but vital knowledge soon to be splurted out in a well organized manner in just 4 short weeks. I'm psyched oh yes i am.
That being accomplished i thought that well, i deserve to watch some Scrubs (emphasis on some). Those primarily few episodes soon turned into 13 or 14 episodes. Great, i'm wasting my life.
In order to feel just a little bit productive and efficient, i decided to go grocery shopping - a tedious task we all (well those of us who go grocery shopping at least) try to avoid. It wasn't too bad today though, because Ella decided to come along and we had a very nice bike ride there and back, and  even though i wore a hoodie instead of my jacket, i wasn't cold! i LOVE springtime! It really does make life more worth living.
Aand then somehow Time just kind of... ran for the hills yelling in a  thick scottish accent "You'll NEVER catch me now, laddies!!!"  and now it is 3:30 in the morning... weird huh? I thought so too.
So, Goodnight my wonderful blog-readers

Uuuh i'm coming down with a cold...
Today when i got home i "tried" to study and did a miniscule amount of biology, while drinking peppermint tea and eating toast in hope of that getting me better. Alas, nothing. I thought my head was going to explOde!!! Okay now i'm making it sound worse than it is but still! Whenever i'm sick i always feel like i could die right there and then even if its just a sore throat. I exaggerate. Yes yes i do. Aaaanyways, i went to bed at 4 in the afternoon, hah first time in my life i've ever done THAT. i felt like a little kid during nap time - why don't we have those anymore?  Anyways, i slept for 4 hours and now my carcadian rhythm is all screwed up. it's 12 and i'm not tired... geeeeenious. Hehe ^_____^ plus the fact that i woke up at 9 on a saturday... yes this break is going to be weird.

So then tonight Nathalie, Henny, and Jenny came over despite my sicky germs all over the place and cheered me up! :D we ate toast. And talked about Nathalie's foot-phobia. And drew pictures of our future men... ahem. I feel better now.

Ohohohoooohhh! On saturday i cleaned the whole house. Everything. And dusted and vacuumed and even took the blankets out and aired them outside. i feel so grown up right now. but to make up for any grownupness i might have acquired while cleaning, i had an epic waterfight with Ella, Olof, and their parents! Ah, it was beastly and wonderful. Then we grilled hamburgers in the sunshine and drank bubbly water with lemons in it.

It's break!!!!!! ITS BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP! not. i'm going to study. my mind will be wired on biology, psychology, math, and spanish hopefully. my thinking will not be coherent im afraid, and whatever i manage to write on here will be jibberish and nonsense... a little bit like right now... in my defense i'm sick.

Gueeess what? Today it was warm and sunny outside. i could run over to the grocery store to buy an apple and a donut without getting my jacket (this is AMAZING). And then Sylvia, Ingrid, Vicks and me sat by the canal that runs through the city in the SUN and ate some spring-rolls. Quite fitting seeing as it is juuust about spring, if the weather have a hissy-fit and go cold on us again. Which won't happen.
So then after school we went spreading the love... how hippie doesn't that sound... i wish i was a hippie... no, there's this church called Vineyard that stands out on the street every thursday giving out coffee and cookies to passer-byers and we join them sometimes and its so much fun! People are either scared of us and run away or try to look busy as they walk by ignoring us, oor they get really really really happy and dare to taste a cup of coffee and a cookie and have a meaningful conversation with a stranger. How strange in this time and day. The whole doing things for free is long-forgotten, but we should all bring it back. Seriously. People think its totally weird, but they really do love it... so cliché but free stuff is the best. i hate clichés so sorry about that.
Then, being the good wonderful amazing friend that i am (hah), i went to Anna's and helped her with some English. Dang i'm on a roll i'm just helping everybody tonight.
If i believed in bonus points or karma i would be good to go.
If i did.

I can't stop snoozing. i can't. Today it took 20 minutes before i even heard my alarm go off... uuuuh sick of school? maybe?!
I'm thinking about packing now. 20 kilos plus 5 kilos carry on. HOW do i fit my life in 20 kilos... hah i shouldn't care so much about things. I have my pictures, so i'll be okay ^___^
On saturday two friends turned 18, and had a hawaii-themed-party :P i cant say i went all in for it... but i leave you all with this retarded picture which for some reason i really like hmm. not my glasses but i love them. they bring out my inner dork :] yesssssss

After having stayed up until 2 in the morning working on a school thing, i woke up at 6. It was okay until i sat up and looked outside the window to be met by a whirl of white. Snow. Lots of it. And i just sat there completely apathetic feeling sorry for myself for about 15 minutes until i decided to get up and do something with my life/day. I missed the first bus on purpose, and then for the second bus i was running late, so i ran out the door and was swallowed by the snowfall, and since i was late i ran/power walked the whole way to the busstop and when i got there i was all gross and hot from running, but in fact i was early and oculd have taken it easy. I always think its a little embarassing to run to the bus and then not be late after all, i don't know why.
Anways, then after school i met up with my Nathalie, Henny and Jenny :D because we were responsible for the "fika" at youthgroup, so we shopped and made grilled cheese sandwiches! Everyone loves that. In sweden too! Aah i can't write everyting that happened tonight because that would take too long and i'm quite tired.  Anyways, here are some pictures from our walk!

...

Tonight i was asked the quesion: Whyy are you a christian? It is so hard to answer that one on the spot...
But it's because in this crazy chaotic world, God is the only thing that makes sense and never fails, it's because i can feel completely safe because of him, it's because of a personal relationship, because of things that can't be explained on human terms, because of things that can't be described in words.
It's possibly the hardest question i know, because i don't have one concrete answer, and i wish i did.

Okay this was supposed to be written on Wednesday, so pretent it's Wednesday just for this one time. Great!
As i bet aaaall of you already knew, today was the swedish annual Waffle Day! Which is when we eat waffles. MMMM. soo in honour of this swedish tradition Sylvia, Ingrid, and Pix came and stayed over and we... well first we made 4 pizzas, and then we talked and helped me with my spanish homework, and then at 11 pm we remembered the waffles. Ah, late night waffles with these wonderful people beat many things in life.

Woow today i acctually made real dinner! instead of coming home from school at 6ish and eating sandwiches and stuff i was good and made real food! Spaghetti and because meatballs are boring i made them sweet chili. This is totally irrelevant by the way.
Oh and guuuueeees who's back? WINTER. Guh. Woke up today to a beaauutiful sunrise and then i sit up, look outside the window and see white. Everywhere. Sure its pretty and all but... sigh. I cannot wait for warmth!!! Just the other day it was soo nice, i sat outside in just a tanktop and shorts and now theres enough snow that in America the schools would be closed. Hah.
Oh and a side note, i land in PNG in... 2 months and 23 days!!!!!! :D That is soon. Very soon. But uuuuuuh im gonna miss people here! Stupid distance aall the time. But still, SOON!
Aaaah i have nothing worth writing! So i will give you random details of the recently's. This morning i realized i had locked my cat in the bathroom the whole night. she was a little upset... I just finished season 5 of Scrubs, big accomplishment i know... my mascara is running dry... this morning i only snoozed 3 times... i was in school for 9 hours straight today. 8 to 5. no candy... today i have surpressed the urge of biting my nails! all day! and tomorrow Sylvia, Ingrid and me are having waffles. It's the annual waffle day! waffle is a funny word. okay i'm done wasting your time and procrastinating now.

Last night was prettyful. I was walking home at like 9 at night and it was all starry outside and it was reasonably warm ( a couple of degrees above freezing) and i was listening to good good music and i was thinking a lot. And i was thinking pretty deep stuff too but now that the moment is gone i can't recall any of my thoughts... don't you hate it when that happens? i should carry a diary with me at all times and then when i feel inspired i can plop down beside the road or wherever and scribble my thoughts down in it so i can read them later and laugh at myself at how not-deep i am :P

There's not really much to say... Nathalie, Henny and Jenny crashed here for a couple of days mohahaha. ALWAYS fun! I can't really describe the whole weekend with words other than that we spent an unhealthy amount of time in front of my webcam taking pictures :P and sang David Beddingield - If You're Not the One passionately :D
Now what you've all been waiting for: Pictures!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Umm yes.... sort of an inside joke so sorry for posting this but i like this picture! :D


Mohahaa moustaches!


BUBBLES!!!


And haha this makes me laugh. Me: crack happy, Jenny: Emooooo


If any of you have seen the show Joey, thats what this is from. And you've just been hit with our sex rays! :P


So uuuh, happy next week everybody!

I love these kids! Ella is 7 and Olof is 3 and they are soo cute! And they love me :P haha.
This might look dangerous but.... kids are allowed to have some fun, right? I remember i did this when i was little except for Tobias and I would jump from the loft/attic onto matresses... aaah good times good times.

Look at this! Happiness and exitement and with the hair(!) i love the hair :D


Look at Olof's face. That is pure joy and exhiliration right there. And he's superman.


This is HAPPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!


Look at this kid, how can you not love him!? plus the green leprachaun pj pants ^^


Oh the fun you can have with a couple of blankets and pillows.

Oookay so i need to get better at updating this thing.
Good good weekend! I think all of it was good. Except for the part where the alarm didnt go off... anyways. On saturay Henny and Jenny came! And we watched Blades of Glory (love that movie!!!) and we ate junkfood, and played the guitar, and for some reason the only music listened to the whole weekend was by The Early November :P good band by the way! Yeah, so now all those songs are forever etched into my memory haha. We didn't do much at all but time still fleeew away. stupid time. Anwyays, church the next day on sunday so i set the alarm for 8:30. Do you think it goes off? Nnnoo of course it doesnt! Haha so Nathalie calls her mom to come pick us up and she did because she is amazing, but we had had no time to get ready or anything, so let me tell you, there was some serious hair-straightening-action done in the hallway there at church. Not me of course, no i was waving my already curly hair in their faces smirking and laughing to myself. Muahahaha.
On the walk home: genious idea! We bake a cake! It was for Markus who just turned 18, and we're trying to get on his good side so he'll drive us places now that he has a drivers licence. Define baking.... does it involve buying a ready-made cake crust thing and then whipping up some chocolate mousse as a filling and then wipping up more whipped cream for the top? In that case yes, yes we baked a cake. And decorated it with Smarties. All by ourselves! :D so proud.
And ate a real dinner - spaghetti and meatballs. Basically a productive afternoon! And Markus loved the cake bytheway. it was good. I mean, duh it was good, WE whipped the cream!?
Sunday ended wtih getting a ride to Annas where i am going to live this week.... just because i can. And because Anna is cool! :D And Nathalie came too and many hours were spent with something which can only be classified as girl talk :D
Aand school on monday. Monday will be another blog update thingie which i will do when i get the pictures off my camera which i forgot at my house. Hehe.
And now some pictures from the weekend :D

A typical walk: We tried getting everyone in but.... yeah :P So for you who dont know, it goes Jenny, Nathalie, Me, and Henny(s nose).


What my kitchen looks like :P notice messy table,
computer, bowl with chocolate mousse, cookie jar, etc.


And this is the cake!!! :D
 

THE END (of the weekend. sniff)

Helloo people! okay i have nothing to say so i'll tell you about my day! Oh the exitingness of it all. Well yesterday i had my spanish presentation whiiich i didnt fail! That was because the day before i had recorded my whole presentation thing and put it on my iPod and then i listened to it the rest of the day and then on the bus on the way to school. Do you know how annoying it is to listen to ME talk for hooours??? I bet you do, but don't agree with me :P So yeah. I have come to the conclusion that my voice is funny.
Theeeen Nathalie came over! Woo party party! Hah basically we ate, Youtubed, talked, were being stupid... somehow time flew away and we went to bed at 3... and then today we woke up at 12!!! Ugh! I hate waking up that late because then my whole DAY is ruined and there isnt time to do anything so i just end up sitting on my bed in my pjs all day eating cereal playing with my toes.... or something equally lame. haha. okay now i that i have wasted a little bit of your day... by the way i just now was a hero. I convinced Nathalie not to commit suicide by jumping off my tv. Yes, thankyou thankyou thankyou. I dont knwo how, but somehow i... im just at the right place at the right time... okay i'll stop being stupid now sigh but its so much fun! Muahahaha.

So lazy. This is from baking 4 days ago. plus some more dishes. Yes i am lazy. I'm sure you all wanted, needed, craved to know that, and that i have enlightened your day. Hm yes don't you feel lucky to be included in the inner circle... or something. Anyhow, you're included. And don't judge my mess It's what happens when you live alone! Hehe :P

Todaaaaaay has been a good day. Tiresome but good. Do you know why? I FOUND THE FIRST LEAF BUD THING ON A TREE!!!! And do you know what that means? SPRING!!!! Okay so the bud can't accually be classified as open or a leaf but i saw something that gave me hope... hapiness!

So yesterday Sylvia, Ingrid, Linda and I decided that... the mall was slightly more appealing than math and swedish... hehe sooo we went to the mall! :] It happens and i dont think our teachers mind too much. i think they think we deserve it. or thats what im trying to tell myself ;) so we ATE at this place called SO YA (which stands for soya if you didnt get that) and i bought two new gauge earrings which i cant get in quiiite yet but i'm working on it! And we went to IKEA and dreamed away to when we get our own place away from home (i'm already there suckerrrs :P)!

And then we had FIKA! *Sigh* you americans don't know what fika is but its a swedish expression that i will be using a lot and it means sitting down and having coffee and a cookie or a pastry of some sort, and it can be done anytime, anywhere, and it is a big part of the swedish culture. So basically what we do when we aren't in class, we are fika-ing. Such a waste of money but good stuff! And theen we had a bus adventure! First we almost missed it and then when we were on and had driven quite a while there was construction ahead of us, so we had to back all the way back to the bus stop place. It is really hard backing a bus, not that i know but it seemed difficult. Anyways, afterwards when the busdriver had backed all the way up a loong hill with a bus we started an applause for him and (almost) EVERYONE clapped with us! I was so proud.

Then home home at last, and we ate sandwhich pizzas and danced around matches. Because i told them that's what we do in the jungle where I come from. The call me Jungle-Elin. Pretty spiffy huh?

Then today i woke them up when i was snoozing my alarm hahHA. The power.

Yes, these beautiful cookies you see in the picture are in fact, my creation. AND I didn't burn anything! except for one cookie which was all alone and small, so I ate it. Muahaha.
The sad thing is though, is that I'm giving them away. Our ex youth pastor guy is turning 25 sooooo... we (Malin, Henny, Jenny, Anna, Carro, and Nathalie for those of you who wonder who "we" are) are going to be nice to him today.

It is snowing. Again. Hard. I mean come ooon it's March already! Spring should be here by now... or something. Hah, well maybe i should go play out in the snow for all you snow-deprive people over there on the other side... naaah I don't think so. Go outside?!? When it's COLD?????? no. Not unless i mustmustmuuust.

Haha! it is 3 in the morning, and Nathalie and I just got finished making the lamest stupidest most amazing quiz on Facebook :P haha i hope nobody finds it because nobody will understand it mohaha. Anyways, so this weekend i haven't been home except for 5 minutes to get some clothes. Yesterday after school when i failed my spanish presentation and my teacher basically told me that i suck and compared me to a bunch of other students who did amazingly or something went to Annas to write her english report for her haha and then from there on to Carro's birthday! Mmm tacos. and we had a ton of fun and basically talked most of the time and just had a good time and... there was so much candy... anyways, I followed Nathalie home hehe and this morning i got woken up by a big slobbery tongue belonging to their dog Don. Awww
   And thEn wow. so she is remaking her room and her mom told her to vacuum the floor a little bit because it was really dirty, and we ended up cleaning her whooole room dusting and sorting and curtains and mopping and rearranging the furniture... and that was our afternoon haha :P but still so much fun!
Then we made fun of this swedish thing called the Melody Festival where crappy swedish artists perform and sweden votes on the best ones. And they were all either wearing golden body socks or feathers... sweden ya know. and then we watched Bolt! holy cow we laughed soooo much! As in gasping for air crying type of funny. After Finding Nemo all the animated movies went downhill but this one is in the same class as Nemo, and that is not something i say about a lot of movies.
Anways. it is 3 in the morning. again. why do i do this to myself? And my hair is gross and greasy but i'll take a shower tomorrow. yeah you all needed to know that. okay goodnight!!!
i leave you with this:

So Mom left today... I don't really know what to feel. Recently (these last couple of months) I have just shut off my emotional feelings because it's easier that way, not having to cry at night. So when mom left, sure it felt a bit empty. The house felt bigger, emptier, but it wasn't like a sad goodbye. It was more just a "i'll see you in a bit" type of thing.  Haha, maybe i'm just growing up :P Naaah that can't be it.
I have a cell phone now! Except for there is something wrong wtih it --- i cant send text messages. eh? blaaah oh well i'll fix that eventually... I have a cell phone!!!!! :D yaaay! I now have contact with the outside world for the first time in about 1 and a half weeks. its been long. Technology is taking over our lives!!!
Now i'm going to leave you for a couple of episodes of Scrubs. Scrubs forever <3 haha :P

Haha not really no but yesterday me and Mom cleaned the whole house! in only 3 hours! So productive right? and i dusted off all my shelves and threw away one or two things, and organized, and vacuumed. Oh! And we also made müsli! I feel so healthy right now :P
Aanyways so mom flies away tomorrow, hm what kind of mother leaves her daughter in another country two times in 7 months? Tsk Tsk. Haha but no im fine, its just that everyone thinks i wont be, like the people here from my church for example. Eeevery time i meet an old lady she is like "Soo, has it been fun with mommy here? Haha yeeea it bet it has!" and i mean there is nothing wrong wtih them caring but its the look in their eye that they get when they say it that and i know they're thinking how poor and unfortunate i am and what a hard life i must be living and how im the most perfectest child they have ever seen. guh! I dont like to be seen as an angelic child. But now im just being ungrateful... aanyhoo.
I can't wait to go back to PNG. But at the same time i'm afraid that i'm going to have built up this picture of how great its going to be and its not going to be as amazing as i thought... its not like i wont like it there but its always hard coming back someplace after having been gone because so much has changed - mostly people. But still, i cAn't wait!
OOoh! i just heard the first signs of spring!! This morning when mom and I went to church I heard the birds chirping, and the snow (we have like 15 cm of snow its crazy!) was all melting and dripping :D yAy! i am soo sick of this stupid cold wintery cold weather that bites your cheek (in the not cute aww its biting but more the AAARRRGHH GET IT OFF ME GET IT OFF ME AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH IT BUUUUURNS type of way). Heh, so now you know that! :P okay i have nothing to write because my weekend has been pretty much uneventful haha. i love them that way. so now i will go and get some music for tobias for mom to take with her... Todelooo hope you have a good day!

Okay I'm switching to English for all y'all who don't know swedish hahaaa i laugh at you :P so how are you guys? write me!
Anyways, now I will tell you about my day. And how much i suck at doing exams. Well first of all I was up til 2 last night studying, then i got like 4 hours of sleep and then up again at 6! yay! I don't remember much of tihs morning because i was so tired and it seem like such a long time ago. So first up was my Swedish exam, compare 2 works, how the emotional plot is just as important at the exeternal one... yah okay sure. Theeen Psychology Paper 1 which went okay i think, i could answer all of the short answer questions and the essay question but THEN... uuuurrgh it makes me mad! Paper 2. I have never. Never written anything worse in my life. NOT even exaggurating! I was supposed to chose questions from this one section but i didn't remember that so i chose something compleetely different that i havent even studied and dont ask me how i managed to write on it... but i did. then i realized my mistake. Whatever.
Uuuhh okay well at least im DONE! and it feel sOO good; i've been dreading this week for soo long! *big sigh of relief* and not that you guys can read swedish but over the last couple of days i have written about nothing other than my complaints over schoolwork, so i won't have to write depressing school stuff either!
Pluus Mom is making Spaghetti right now so i get to eat! Need FOOOOOOOOOOD. I need sleep. hah, sorry for the most dreary and depressing blog thing ever :P

Seriöst. Jag förstår inte ibland - rätt ofta faktiskt. Ikväll såg jag på Uppdrag Granskning eller vad det nu hette på TV om en tjej som hade blivit utslängd av sin mamma, och misshandlad av sin pappa, och socialen gjorde INGENTING. Dom visste heeeela tiden att detta hände men nej nej dom kan ingenting göra. Världen... jag stör mig så himla mycket på all skit som finns och alla dumma människor som bara inte bryr sig om andra längre! Jag förstår inte hur man kan jobba inom socialvårdnaden och inte BRY sig om människor. Det är ju därför dom är DÄR. Ugh. Samhället går utför. Världen blir sämre och sämre. Det händer mer skit och de som kan ändra iallafall en liten del... det verkar inte som om nånting händer.
*suck* Men det händer fortfarande bra saker också... bara lite (mycket) svårt att komma ihåg det när nästan allt som visas på media är negativt. Man blir smittad helt enkelt! Men man blir inspirerad också. Jag tänker iallafall att jag INTE ska vara som dom som inte bryr sig om sina medmänniskor. Enligt mig är det våran plikt som människor att ta ansvar, inte tänka att "åh, men grannen ringer säkert polisen så jag behöver inte göra det". Alla har ett ansvar! Förlåt att jag har predikat så mycket om det här nu men det är verkligen något som jag tycker starkt om, och jag tycker att världen somv i lever i skulle vara mycket bättre om vissa saker var mer som det var förr när mamma och pappa var unga. Då gick det att lifta från en stad till en annan utan att oroa sig (till en viss del) att bli kidnappad eller vadsomhelst. Generellt sätt tycker jag inte folk är lika "snälla" som dom var förr. Det gör mig ledsen.
Anyways, ska fokusera på positiva saker nu. Spanskan gick bättre än väntat, dock återstår morgondagens uppsatsskrivning då jag kommer att bli riktigt sur för att jag inte kan. Jag hatar att inte kunna! Därför gillar jag skolan tror jag; jag gillar att lära mig saker för då känner jag mig smart, haha. Hursomhelst hittade jag Sylvia, Ingrid, och Carro på ett cafe efter spanskan och dEt är ju alltid kulkul! Åh så skönt att bara prata (och äta maha). Jag saknar dom dagarna då vi hade tid att bara fika. Men dom dagarna kommer igen!
Sen fika med mamma när jag kom hem, kaffe och tre sorters kakor blev det: havrekakor, pepparkakor, och hemgjorda chocolate chocolate chip cookies. GOTT. Justde, jag hade sovmorgon idag också så man kan säga att dagen har varit lyckad! Fy vad bra jag har det... *förbered dig på en klyscha* Livet är inte rättvist!